Friday, April 23, 2010

At Great Expense

My school does nothing except in extremes. Our start-up was a "hit-the-ground-running" scenario, with no buildings (only a dirt lot) just weeks prior to opening. In like manner, the teacher appreciation that the parent community expresses is no less intensive. I sit surrounded by vases of gloriously scented flowers, and the kinds of food that would be detrimental to any figure.

But the reason I rejoice is that God has defined once again, with His gentle clarity, the amazing nature of giving. For it is no small thing to be granted tangible displays of affection, by which one expresses a kindly gratitude for one's presence or deeds, nor is it anything lightly received to know the bestowal of good will and nurturing care. But there is a kind of giving which transcends in nature even those most generous and gregarious, overtly-pleasing acts. There is, as I was brought to tears today with the reminder, the gift of the will, and it is a most costly and gracious gift.

It was as I was cleaning up the classroom, readying to lock up, that my eye was caught on a small yellow Post-It note left on the shelf behind my desk. On it, scrawled in turquoise marker, were six simple words and a name, penned by one of my students who has - much to my chagrin - felt increasingly alienated from the class because of his excessive talking, and the challenge he still has in using self-control.

As I stared at the note, suddenly all of the gifts given by parents and students all week - the roses, the calla lilies, and irises; the homemade meals and hand-made cards; the warm drinks and warm thoughts - took their proper perspective. For on this one, small note was written the gift that cost the greatest sacrifice, for surely it was the present that demanded the most from its giver. The declaration was straightforward and heartily determined: "My gift is being on task!"

Of all of the kindnesses and well-wishes, of all of the deeds that were intended to bring me cheer and comfort, this one had behind it an enormity of costliness. For in it was every bit of intentionality, and a striving to overcome for my sake; and in it was wrapped the depth of knowledge of what was truly pleasing in my sight.

He had not handed me platitudes which he would quickly rescind. He had not chosen to convey fleeting sentiments that he could easily betray with his actions. Neither had he proffered something which would minimize what would be required of him. Instead, he had elected that which would, by its very nature, set no limit on the scope of what it would cost him. He had committed himself, in decided efforts, to that very purpose and demonstration which would not simply be costly, but would invariably be the most expensive gift he could offer.

I am by no means untouched by the devotion and loving appreciation which have overflowed and overwhelmed me all week. Nor am I able to adequately thank all of those involved for such extensive and magnanimous efforts, but I am exceedingly mindful that the giving that exacted the most was that which meant an exercise of the will. And it is through such that I am mindful of why God has made so plain: He is not interested in tangible presentations as He is with a will bent on pleasing Him.

As Jeremiah 7:22-23 words it:

"'For I did not speak to your fathers, or command them in the day that I brought them out of the land of Egypt, concerning burnt offerings and sacrifices. But this is what I commanded them, saying, "Obey My voice, and I will be your God, and you will be My people; and you will walk in all the way which I command you, that it may be well with you."'"